message on the 506

While taking the 506 Carlton streetcar the other day, I found a plastic bag that had been left by another passenger by accident. In this bag was an empty greeting card box, several cardboard coin roll wrappers, a permenant marker, a pencil, and a handful of cut-outs: poetry, advice, verses, etc.

Below is what I found on one of them:

"Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone; to have a deep, full relationship with another; to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God says, "NO. Not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content with being loved by me alone; with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me; to have an intensely personal and unique relationship with me alone. I love you, my child. Until you discover that only in me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another until you are united with me; exclusive of anyone or anything else; exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning and stop wishing. Allow me to bring that person to you. You just keep watching me, expecting the greatest things. Keep listening and learning the things I tell you. You just wait. That's all."


"Don't be anxious, don't worry; don't look around at the things others have or what I've given them. Don't look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking up to me, or you'll miss what I want to show you. You just keep looking up to me, for when you are ready, I'll surprise you with a love more wonderful than you would have ever dreamed of. You see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready...I am working even this minute to have you both ready at the same time...until you are both satisfied, exclusively with me and the life I have prepared for you, you will not be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with me. This is perfect love.

"And dear one, I want you to have this wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with me, and enjoy materially and concretely, the everlasting union of beauty, perfection and love that I offer you with myself."

"Please know that I love you utterly. Believe it and be satisfied."

Author Unknown

(I found a slightly different version online here)

running to stand still

The Treadmill - A Philosophical Rant

When was the last time you spent an hour - an entire hour - doing "nothing"? TV doesn't count as studies have shown that viewing television uses less brain power than sleeping, and I'm not addressing laziness. I'm addressing the ridiculously imbalanced work to rest ratio that our society thrives on.

"Nothing", to me, can mean a variety of activities (reading, walking, writing, journaling) but I like to define "nothing" as a chunk of time devoid of time restraints. A chunk of time used to unwind as opposed to winding up. Andrew wears a T-shirt with "time is an invention" on it and I love it because it makes me stop and think...if time is an invention, and we invented time, why aren't we realizing that we're victims of our own invention?

I had a counseling session with a friend of mine yesterday and we discussed my general, frenetic state. It has been a lifetime habit, intensifying during university and again when I was an event coordinator for TVB, and has been almost non-stop over the past year; more specifically, the past six months. The essence of the chaos was pinpointed as a lingering fear of not arriving at my "destination"...but having little to no idea what/where the "destination" is. In the meantime, I miss out on the journey itself.

Frustrating.

Have you ever noticed that culture (urban culture, more poignantly) is fueled by people who are, in turn, fueled by coffee? This is not an original thought - I must admit that I stole it from my mother, Lois. Every morning (and afternoon, and late afternoon, and evening) we drink an extra-large, triple-shot, sugar-free hazelnut CUP OF ANXIETY with extra foam. To go. Because we couldn't possibly sit down to enjoy it.

This counselor-friend of mine mentioned that a friend of hers had recently gone to a Watchmen for the Nations retreat where the participants did "nothing" but listen and wait for God to speak. For four days. The unanimous revelation, at the end of the four days, was God's warning: the world is consumed with hurry - slow down, trust Me, be aware.

Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feelin' groovy
- Simon & Garfunkle, "The 59th Street Bridge Song"

"What can I say? I live my life to the utmost...I just try to stay loose, stay liquid, laugh a lot, and be ready. That's what Dupree's doing with his life's little pod, man. Staying nimble. Until I get the call from the mother ship. My raison d'etat."
- Randolf Dupree, "You, Me and Dupree"

and then a hero comes along

My best friend, CathArine Patricia Dias, has just completed one week building houses in Belize. Her boyfriend, Paul, has posted some pictures of their adventure here. This is just one of the reasons that I heart Kate.

I mean, who could possibly look hotter in a tool belt? Paul agrees.

piano man

I spent the first half of today stressed out of my tree due to work issues, and the second half listening to piano on the radio. The second half all but erased the first.

I am not what they would call "musical". By this I mean I can not read it, play it, or understand it. It's a foreign science to me. Sometimes I wonder if I would be so absolutely enchanted by it if I had studied it... Jacob once asked me, however, and rightfully so: "Do you have a musical soul?" and, for the first time, in reference to a question regarding music, I was able to answer in the affirmative.

Sing us a song, you're the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
And you've got us feelin' alright

Oh, la la la, de de da
La la, de de da da da

- Billy Joel, "Piano Man"

camp stole my boyfriend...

...and my youngest brother, Seth. Oh, and about half a million of my other closest friends. For a week. Poo. The other day, as Andrew and I ate sushi, I almost teared up at the thought of a kid getting the chance to go to camp THE NIGHT BEFORE (which was in the works while we ate...via beepy-phone), as there were still spots available at the last minute. Camp is like Christmas to me. I love it. It's also the reason behind my mild addiction with the forest.

There must be something to this: Andrew and Seth are at camp. Nik and Thea just flew across the globe to start teaching in South Korea. Kate and Paul are returning from Belize sometime soon. And I'm...not doing any of those things. For the first time in my life. How odd.

Which reminds me, I should look up flights to B.C...

ok go

Check. This. Out.
I heart these guys.
They remind me of my brother.

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

anne

Allow me a moment of girly whim.

I have been, since I was old enough to be read to, mildly obsessed with Anne of Green Gables. There was more than a little vicarious participation in reading those books, over and over. In fact, I won Miss Mini-Yo-We my L.I.T. summer, for my representation of Anne Shirley. I've been to "the bridge" in Gormley, Ontario. And a good friend of mine, Caron, has faithfully referred to me as "Anne" since I was twelve...and I like it even though I'm now twenty-six.

And we all know my thoughts on Gilbert Blythe.

All this sentiment has flooded my mind since discovering this video on a friend's myspace (thanks, Ginette). I particularly like how they chose the song "A Message" by Coldplay. For many reasons.

I remember having a conversation with a friend of mine, Mari, about three or four years ago, during which we lamented that there wasn't any hope of us having overlooked a Gilbert in our own lives. I guess that's what Anne thought too. I'm happy to have been wrong.