down with emo

Ever have one of those moments when you're absolutely sure that everything's going to be OK? I had one of those moments this morning. I'm looking forward to having a lot more of those moments in the future.

sweet blogging freedom is mine!

The ability to comment has again been made available to me and I can't remember a time when I savoured it more. Nothing is quite as wonderful as being without something, and to have it returned.

In other, completely random, news, A. (as I refer to him in my journal, for time's sake...and it's grown on me) directed my attention to this post on Adele's (an e-friend by proxy) blog. Oh, how true. Please note the double-exclamatory statements made by both myself and A.

I went to an absolutely delectible evening last night at The Gladstone called The Haunted Fishtank, an introduction made through my friend Kylah. Poetry reading, guitar strumming...even some bizarre interpretive dance. It was like wine to my soul. In fact, it was wine to my stomach as well as the darling bartender, Kerry, brought two reds to our table - on the house.

le battement d'ailes du papillon

Which, in my botched OAC French level, I translate as "the war of the butterfly's garlic". I'm sure I'm mistaken. In any case, the movie might be recognized by it's English title, "Happenstance", starring that adorable Audrey Tautou from "Amelie" (one of my favourite movies of all time).

I watched it last night and enjoyed it thouroughly. After the movie was finished, the name of a good friend of mine from Korea popped into my mind and so, after over eight months being incommunicado, I composed him a quick email to see how things were (mostly asking whether or not he managed to pursue his dream of becoming a doctor, which we had discussed in length over the course of our friendship). This morning, and before I had a chance to send the email still waiting in my outbox, I received discovered this in my inbox:

Hey there, Its been a while, but i thought i should let you know, since you were the one who got me back on track that somehow i got accepted to medical school and i start in january. thanks again, and let me know what you are up to, i'd like to talk sometime. take care.

Serendipitous!

On Angela's blog she discusses how, due to a chance encounter downtown Toronto, our suspicions have been confirmed: "Everyone on the planet knows Kate and her family."

I like little things like this. The little chance encounters, the role of fate, the every day magic that keeps me wondering.

leap of faith

Sooo...it's back to the drawing board in terms of the job hunt.

Have you ever been watching a movie where the lead character is just about to make a decision that is so obviously not what they're supposed to do? I had this experience recently, watching "The Last Kiss" (starring Zack Graff), with Sarah Gaz, on Saturday. I was actually covering my mouth and squealing, "Nooooo...!" at the screen.

Have you ever had the sensation that you're the character in the movie - the one that other people are covering their mouths and squealing, "Nooooo...!" at? I had this experience last night, coming to terms that a job offer on the table, complete with cushy salary, might just be a twist in the plot. That the lack of sleep, disturbing dreams, and feeling of disappointment in the pit of my stomach might very well be the manifested "Nooooo...!" of my out-of-body self.

Of course, I could also have just made a ginormous mistake. But, for some reason, I was willing to take that chance. And you know what? I feel lighter already.

fie

Although Beta Blogger is making me want to punch babies, à la Dane Cook, because no one can comment on my blog and I am restrained from commenting on anyone else's, I will continue to post anyway. Thanks to those who continue to read despite torturing themselves with such limited commentary options...

*sigh* I should have thought twice before signing up for this "new and improved" blog upgrade. And I'm not the only one. [NOTE: strong language used...none of which is mine, but it very well could have been at this point]

I'll fire off some scathing emails today to see if I can't get those Blogspot goons to get on an antidote and you can post as an "anonymous" commenter and leave your name in the interim.

six

Six months ago this morning I woke up in my bed at the Ports Hotel with this song in my head and that wonderful feeling in my stomach known as butterflies.

By 5:00 p.m. that evening he still hadn't called so I, muttering under my breath something about having got my hopes up for nothing and vowing to de-wing all the butterflies I could get my hands on, left the hotel having given detailed instructions to my roommate should "someone" decide to phone.

I returned later that evening to a little piece of paper on my pillow that read:

"He called. :)"

And he's been calling ever since.*

It's serious breakthrough for someone who had, in the past, relied heavily on something known as the Two Weeks and an Airplane approach to dating... Thanks for sticking it out with me over the past six months, love, and here's to many more.

* Except, of course, for recently as my phone has met its untimely demise. More on this later.

solitary confinement

As we all know, I recently became unemployed. Add to that the fact that my phone, which has been dying a slow and painful death for a few weeks, finally bit the dust. Add to THAT the fact that the internet at my apartment disappeared around 9:00 a.m. this morning and hasn't returned...

At least I still have electricity.

(Oh, how am I posting this, I hear you inquire? Thank Jesus for Star Cafe on Bloor, which has wireless internet. And tea.)

shaken, not stirred

I heart Bond. It's the tailored tuxes, it's the martini, it's the guns, it's the rough-and-tumble, it's the I-barely-know-your-name-but-you'll-be-my-Bond-girl-for-the-next-two-hours attitude. I think every woman has a place in her heart for Bond.

I remember the day that a older man stopped me on the street to remark that I looked like one-time Bond girl, Britt Ekland. It made my day. Nay, month.

The new Bond movie is out, Casino Royale, and the trailer is stellar. I've watched it several times in a row. I'd also like to point out that Bond has managed to graduate from chasing random skirt to actually falling for his Bond girl this time. I approve.

Raowr.

43 things

Dan got me started on this: 43 Things. It's actually quite challanging to come up with 43. I made it to 24 and decided to take a break and come back to it later. Check it out. It's fascinating to see what other people are wanting to accomplish with their lives.

Also, I'd like to point out that Nik and Thea have arrived in Pyongchon safely and are (too) excited to be teaching Korean children:
And because I promised, I tracked down the "Scottish Haka" commercial, in celebration of men in kilts, that I've often told people about and now you can too:

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

the silver screen

I'm a self-proclaimed trailer junkie. I love movie trailers. I'll often go to apple.com/trailers just to view the 1-3 minute "amuse-bouches" laid out like bite-sized candies. In movie theaters, I'll forget what movie I paid $10.50 (if I use my over-four-years-old-outdated U of T student card) for after watching a few trailers. I'm also that person who shrieks when you try to fast forward through trailers at the beginning of a rented or at-home DVD.

Every once in a while, I'll notice trends in the movies that are being released. For example, right now there are seven new trailers that are based on religious, Biblical, or spiritual themes.

• The Reaping deliniates a modern day visitation of the seven plagues of Egypt.
• The Nativity Story is the narrative of Jesus' birth.
• Driving Lessons is about a "shy, bookish 17-year-old...[and his] unpromising summer vacation...spent attending bible classes, and having driving lessons with his overbearing and overly religious mother".
• Al Franken: God Spoke follows a comedian, documentary style, and "his relentless campaign against George Bush and the Right Wing".
• Conversations With God, based on the book, is about a man who writes down God's messages...and becomes a millionaire.
• Darshan The Embrace, another documentary, hails Amma, a spirtual guide and "Mahatma" who has given her embrace to an estimated over 26 million people worldwide.
• And Jesus Camp, which disturbed me most of all, showing the "revival" in America and its manipulation of children, is being hailed as "an admirably even-handed film" although the imagery makes me doubt it very much.

I'm not quite sure what to make of all this but somehow the mixing of stereotypes, politics, sarcasm, the supernatural, financial success, and Hollywood makes me feel nauseous.

I'd love to hear people's thoughts on this trend. Am I just oversensitive?

deflated

Feelin' a wee bit "in it"* right now.

• Went into work this morning. Was fired. A first for me.
• Biked home in the rain.
  
• This: "Unfortunately, you cannot post a comment on a non-beta blog or claim a mobile blog using your Google Account. These features are coming soon." explains why I can't properly post comments on many people's blogs (or post several of the same comments, much to the annoyance of others). I knew there was a catch to this Google Blog upgrade...

Despite it all, I feel quite calm. I had a feeling this was all coming down the tube (in fact, my morning was pretty much ruined with the sense that something ominous was going to happen...) and when I discovered it was only the loss of the job that was causing me to loose sleep anyway, I was comforted.

And now, on to the job search. Again.

Septembers, for the past eight years running, have always brought this kind of personal-detoxing shock my way. And every time God demolishes something pretty I have prided myself on (a Two Year Plan, a job, a relationship), he is so faithful to give back more than I could have ever dreamed possible in return.

"The bricks have fallen down,
but we will rebuild them with dressed stone;
the fig trees have been felled,
but we will replace them with cedars."
(Isaiah 9:10)

* from the movie Garden State -
Sam: "You're in it right now, aren't you?"
Andrew: "What?"
Sam: "My mom always says that, when she can see like I'm working something out in my head, she's like, 'you're in it right now' and I'm looking at you telling this story, and you're definitely in it."

tall and tanned and young and lovely

I have something to report.I feel guilty even typing this. I'm not supposed to make this public until Kate gives me the go-ahead. But I can't help it. I'm just going to save this as a draft and post it later...

I'm sure that they'll post the news/story on their own blogs/websites, along with a pictoral narrative, so I'll just tell you my side of the story.

Kate and Paul and I met up for coffee this evening, at the Green Bean in Oakville. Kate handed me a card. I read the card. It read:

"September 1, 2006
To my dearest Sarah,
After many-a-conversation, the time has finally come. Your cupid e-mails served their purpose in making a dreamy match. For that, my friend, my fiancé and I thank you. Let me take this opportunity now to ask you, friend, officially;
Will you be my maid of honour at our upcoming wedding?
Love, Kate DIAS"

Now, you must realize, I read this:
"...Sarah...time has finally come...cupid...match...fiancé..." and then I stopped reading, screamed, and burst into tears simultaneously. Many hugs, more tears, more shrieking. It was a great moment. I find it amusing that she asked me to be her maid of honour...even after about five years of discussing it in detail. Maid of honour. What an honour.

I'm still a little dazed. Several damp Kleenexes and a very long GO Train/streetcar ride back to High Park later, I'm listening to songs that remind me of Kate and it's all starting to sink in: Paul Graham, my friend of over 10 years (I was unaware of his real name for many of those years - I have referred to him as "Boyle", his camp name, since the age of 16), proposed to my best friend in the world, Kate Dias, in a kilt on a mountain top.

IN A KILT.
ON A MOUNTAIN TOP.
And she has the rock that will break her arm. All is right with the world.
Paul and Kate are engaged.
Paul and Kate are getting married.
Paul and Kate will be married.
And I am so, so, so, SO very happy for them.

This very secret
That you're trying to conceal
Is the very same one
That you're dying to reveal
Go tell her how you feel
This very secret heart
Go out and share it
This very secret heart
- Feist, "Secret Heart"